I SHOULD WAKE UP!!!


Monday is the day..
The so-called official start of prelims.
So far,i'm just concentrating on my maths.
And no other subjects.
Just what the heck am i doing now?
I don't know.
I'm just so forgetful that i actually left my books for monday's exam in school.
Damn..Why can't i just be slightly more careful and not so forgetful?
If i fail my prelims, i simply deserves it.
Cos i ain't doing any good to myself now..

One thing i hate about myself most is that i always failed to remember those important stuffs and i never fails to remember those useless stuffs..
I also failed to have self-discipline for myself.
I knew i don't want to repeat my mistake which i got my lesson a few years back.
But i just can't be disciplined till now! damnit..I simply hate such feeling.
I can't control my mind, nothing.
How i wish there was someone to discipline me now.
Someone who never fails to study with me almost everyday.
But who will give me the time?
I don't know.
Maybe i'm just being selfish?
Others have their own time and lifes to live.
Here,i am thinking for myself and wishing others could give me their time?
I must be dreaming!!
I'm not bothered so why should others bother?

If i fail my science this time i'll be in dead meat.
K is gonna call whoever's parents who fails prelims which he mentioned beforehand last tuesday.
I think i'm gonna get it this time. For sure.

I can't blame anyone at the end of everything.
But to blame myself.
For not working hard enough.
For not being disciplined enough.
How i wish there could be someone who constantly never fails to wake me up from my sucky attitude..
Motivating me or anything.

I wanna get into the DAVP.
But with my such sucky attitude now,
i don't even need to think to get this course after my 'N' levels.
I'm not doing anything.
Simply nothing for myself.
If i don't get DAVP will i be happy in ITE life?
I don't think so.
Going to one course which i totally disliked doing and isn't my interest.
In future,doing a job that isn't my interest.
I won't be enjoying but suffering.
It feels really terrible.
I really hoped i could be more sensible and working hard for myself.
Not to be disruptted by any other stuffs which is not associated and pointless.
I SHOULD WAKE UP!!